HiBAiSHi

I was shopping at a Dillard’s, or rather, standing around watching somebody else shop… and I was about to leave when this middle-aged black woman stopped me and told me to turn around so she could look at my hair.

Then she asked: “are you chailoke?”

And I stood there confused and looked at her, “…what?”

“Chailowitky?”

By then she could tell I was really puzzled, but then a light bulb went off and she said, “Oh! It’s a mohawk!”

After that I smiled politely and nodded, left as quickly as possible, and my friend had to tell me that because of my dark complexion (read: dirty skin) and new haircut, she was asking me if I was a “Cherokee.”

Lauren left her intentions very clear: she wanted to make me look like Maddox. I agreed to it because, well, I don’t care what my hair looks like most of the time and I thought it would be fun. Plus I was hoping, since it was the night of his LA Galaxy Debut, that she would cut it like Beckham!

At least people notice, right? Another woman at Macy’s later talked to me about it too, saying that “young people these days…” It was like the time when this 300-pound, 50-year-old man saw me standing around at Myrtle Beach waiting to take a shower and asked me if I worked out. I guess it doesn’t matter who notices, just that you get noticed, right? Sad.